Dear Bubbies: I Need Help Finding Motivation To Go Out And Meet People. Help!

Bubbies are here for you

August 21, 2019
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Hi Bubbies! I recently realized I've been making more and more excuses about going out and trying to meet new people. I've been single for over a year now and I used to get out of the house much more often. Now, I find myself finding reasons to stay in alone, cancel dates, and binge-watch TV in pajamas the second I get home from work. It's becoming a cycle, and I need help getting out of it. I'm 32 and feel very secure with who I am and what I do, but I'm in a rut. I know "YOLO,” but how can I change my mindset?  

- Pajama Girl 

 

Hi Pajama Girl! We Bubbies definitely understand what it’s like to be tired and tempted to stay home in our nightgowns and watch TV. Did you know Bubbies Know Best airs repeats every weeknight on JLTV at 7:30PM Eastern?! That keeps us in the house more than it should.

Here’s the thing though -- you lost us at "YOLO". These old ladies had to ask our hostess with the mostest Erin to help us translate.  Now that we know it means "You Only Live Once", we're passing your question off to Erin, who has been through something similar and wanted to share her story with you. 

Says Erin: 
 
A few years ago, I started a new job that would initially require a massive time commitment.  At the end of a particularly grueling week, I had dropped and cracked my phone, had some questionably fishy sushi for lunch and found out my ex was engaged. 

I was broke, bloated, bummed and burnt out, and the last thing I wanted to do was go out. So, I ordered in Mexican food and flipped on the movie You’ve Got Mail.  Right in the middle of the tear-jerking concluding scene of the movie, my friend Leo called, begging me to come out and meet some of his friends at a birthday party. I looked down through teary, puffy eyes at my nacho-stuffed, protruding belly and guacamole spattered on my hoodie.

Then, it hit me: "This is the third Friday in a row that I've locked myself up in my apartment. I should not be sitting here right now. I'm thankfully young, happy and healthy, and life is short. Worst case, Tom Hanks will still be here when I get back."

Fast forward to an hour later (or however long it took me to transform myself). I was on a rooftop patio, utterly captivated by the ginormous biceps of this cute, curly-haired guy wearing a Star of David necklace playing beer pong. I walked over to him, raising my Solo cup, and called out, “L’chaim!” 

“Whoa, you’re Jewish?” he said. 
“Yeah,” I replied. “And, um, I like your hair.” 

I dated this man for almost three years. If I hadn’t wiped away my tears and guacamole stains and gone out, I wouldn’t have met him.

Sure, it all eventually ended with a tragic, teary drawn-out break-up over tea (which I had to pay for) one gloomy winter night, but I wouldn’t trade in those three years for anything. 

So, what’s the point of this story? We all have rough days or even rough weeks. Everyone needs a night off. But when you realize you’ve started making excuses or can’t even remember the last time you’ve gone out, I want you to ask yourself this: “What are the five best experiences I’ve had in my life so far?” 

“Oh! Number three was that Columbus Day weekend I spent binge-watching Breaking Bad while downing an entire square pizza from the neighborhood pizza joint” said no one EVER. 

Are you really too tired, too stressed, too depressed, too pissed at the weather, too PMS-y, or too upset that the Pistons lost in OT to get out of your apartment and socialize? Going out is often like working out — it can appear daunting initially, but it’s doubtful you’ll regret doing it afterwards.  

Life is short. And yes, it can be tiring. Cut yourself some slack — just don’t sever the heck out of it. In the words of Wayne Gretzky, “You miss 100% of the shots you never take.”  YOLO! 

You can do it!

Love, Erin and the Bubbies.

 

You can watch Host Erin Davis and your favorite Jewish Grandmothers - Bubbies Bunny, Linda and S.J. - on Bubbies Know Best on Jewish Life Television, JLTV, Mondays at 8:00PM.  In the Detroit metropolitan area, JLTV can be found on DirecTV Channel 366 and Spectrum Channel 178.

If you would like to ask the Bubbies a question, you can email them at bubbiesknowbest@jltv.tv.